On Dissipating Disapointment

Due to continuing pain (caused by ITB issues & inflamed tendons) I decided yesterday to not run the Country Music Full Marathon as planned. As planned for over 5 months. So much time and energy; so many great mornings spent training with my friends- I don't want to let go of it. It seemed like things were going so well until several weeks ago. Even after my longest run of 17 miles I felt shockingly good. 
I can pin point several mistakes that led to this point, though:
1) I slacked on strength training and did not have the muscular strength to hold my legs in correct alignment.
2) Running an entire speed training workout in shoes that were wrong for me started irritation around my right knee. 
3) When I raced in the Tough Mudder, it escalated from irritation to extreme pain and I decided to finish the half marathon course complete with obstacles, anyway. 
So...I suppose next time I'll know what not to do. And now for some quotes on disappointment:
 

 "Disappointment weighs heavy on the pride." ~Mike  Howerton
 I am nothing if not stubborn. Saying "I can't do the full marathon" is such a blow to my ego. I feel completely confidant in my ability to push through mental challenges because of my will power. I know that I am physically tough enough to push through pain. Withdrawing from a challenge feels like admitting defeat.

"Disappointment is often the salt of life." ~Theodore Parker
This is a disappointment that will leave me stronger, healthier. I came to the decision because continuing could potentially cause greater damage. I have always known that I still want to be active, healthy and happy 20, 30, 40 years down the road and I will accept this disappointment so that I honor that dream.

“The size of your success is measured by the strength of your desire; the size of your dream; and how you handle disappointment along the way.” ~Robert Kiyosaki

How do I handle this? I am so angry- as if my body has betrayed me. I am so disappointed in so many ways I won't go into them all, but trust me, it's been awful. Lots of wailing and gnashing of teeth over here.
But: Jon cheers me up and calms me down, my friends are supportive and they look out for my well-being , and my pups just want to love me. I have a lot of great things to not be disappointed in.

Seamus & Aka always cheer me up; it's time for some photo shoot silliness!

She's so intense. I can relate!

Sweet, sweet Seamus

This is how we roll. One big pile of snuggling.

“I'm disappointed, but I'm not going to run around like Dennis Rodman and head-butt somebody.” ~ Greg Norman

To conclude:
I am pretty crushed, but know that this decision is best for me. I know my non-injured friends are going to have an amazing race at the end of the month. If nothing else, I look forward to being there to cheer them on!

Spring [Paper] Flowers

So, here are long overdue pics of the spring window additions for Rodney Mitchell Salon in Hillsboro Village. There are other products featured in the window, so I needed to come up with something a little smaller in scale, bright and eye catching without cluttering the window.

I found inspiration in Martha Stewart's craft blog; she features artisans who do some really cool projects! After watching a couple flower making tutorials, I broke out the supplies. Lots of tissue paper, craft paper, florist tape, hot glue and dowel rods were used among other things. My favorite part was adding subtle color variations to the tissue paper by dipping it in a bleach and water mixture.

This was an all day project. Actually, it was a couple evenings and a long day project, but it was the perfect indoor project for the dreary spring weather we've been having. My assembly time was really  slow at first but I got faster as I established a technique. Unfortunately though, the faster I went the more frequently I burned myself with hot glue. Scalding hot glue + direct finger contact = blisters. Ouch. After "potting" them in 2 sky blue vases and delivering to their place in the window, I returned home to deal with the post flower creating carnage.

Yes, I am SUPER messy. This is my living room floor/ flower assembling station with Seamus watching from his spot on the couch. The tissue and craft paper cutting were the messiest part. Although, for some reason (whose name is Bella) I ended up with moss strewn about wildly, as well.

 

First a howling blizzard woke us,  
Then the rain came down to soak us,  
And now before the eye can focus -
Crocus.  ~Lilja Rogers

Recylart

THIS is the coolest website. It's basically a brainstorm of sustainable creativity. You're going to love it. You're going to get inspired. You're going to obsess over projects. Or...I may be talking about myself a little.

Candy Chang's public installation "Before I Die, I Want To"  is currently featured on Recylart.com's home page with a link to her website . Go there. NOW.

I haven't scoured through all her work yet, but I am petty entranced with this project, so I'm sure I will. Chang states,  
"I turned the side of an abandoned house in my neighborhood into  giant chalkboard where residents can write on the wall and remember what is important to them in life. Before I Die transforms neglected spaces into constructive ones where we can learn the hopes and aspirations of the people around us."

Before I die I want to ....know that my life had a positive impact.

Before I die I want to ....live an adventurous life.

Before I die I want to ....have let go of regret and guilt.

What about you?

Went Down to Georgia: Part Two

I talked with some of my fellow Tough Mudders last night, and when we were trying to describe the experience to other people- that weren't there- at first we said it was "intense", but that wasn't quite right. "Grueling" is what we came up with:

gru·el·ing also gru·el·ling  (gr-lng, grlng)

adj.

Physically or mentally demanding to the point of exhaustion: a grueling campaign.

"Intense" implies something extreme, but maybe a little more focused...at least to me. There were intense moments for sure- like jumping of the 20ft platform into ice cold water (they literally dumped ice in it) or right or dashing into a tangle of electric live wires.
The bigger challenge of this lay more in the duration and constant level of difficulty. I consider myself a pretty strong willed and athletic person, and this kicked my butt. I thought the run would be a piece of cake, but instead of flat/ semi-flat trails that I could fly through, it was all on mountain and dirt bike trails in the Georgia mountains that amounted to a roller coaster for runners. Some inclines were so sharp I grab had to grab tree trunks and pull myself up them. Some downhills were so steep runners just slid down them (or in a few unfortunate cases, fell and hurt their ankles). And that went on and on and on. The last several miles were also just flat out a surprise. The course maps we were given listed an 11 mile distance. As we passed mile 10's marker though, there was no end in site and multiple obstacles left to complete. I think that was the point that was the most difficult: being mentally prepared to finish, then realizing we're still miles away from the finish line.
The second to last obstacle was this platform jump. That icy water took my breath away, but also give me one last burst of energy. Just in time to bolt through the last obstacle, electrical wires, and hurl myself across the finish line.

I 'm so glad I had these ladies with me; I probably wouldn't still be smiling at the finish if it hadn't been for their comradeship. Even when I made a totally nonsensical statement in a moment of exhaustion, they just went with it and seemed totally supportive of my decision, although no one besides me actually knew what the heck I was talking about. I mean if someone said "No, I don't want to joggle anymore.", would you understand that means "We have to carry a log on our shoulders and I just want to stick with the one I already started to pick up even though someones trying to hand me a different one." No? Well, when I told Sarah E and Mary Taylor that in complete seriousness, they went with it. Then we laughed hysterically about it later, and laughter is one of my favorite ways to burst through the wall of physical and mental exhaustion.
Well done, ladies! And gents (The pic up top is of Cary rocking the monkey bars! he made it across- I did not.)! Was it extremely rough? Yes. Was it the hardest thing I've ever done? No. Will I do it again? Probably!

Me, Mary Taylor, Sarah E